Indecision is the seedling of fear.
~ Napoleon Hill
This week of the Leo Full Moon, Saturn turning retrograde, and Venus moving into Aries, we have a relatively rare visit from the Two of Swords.
The Twos are often about choices, balance, duality, polarity, and opposites. And the Swords in the Tarot are connected to the element of Air. They indicate matters to do with the mind, intellect, attitude, and communication.
This is another of artist Pamela Colman Smith’s “stage” cards, in the Rider-Waite-Smith deck. The straight horizontal line running across the card makes it appear that the figure is on a stage, and behind her, the scene is a theatrical backdrop. In what way, then, is this merely a drama or a story being played out? What is artificial about this situation?
The figure has often been compared to the Justice card. But unlike Justice, the woman in the Two of Swords is blindfolded, choosing not to see. She does not hold the scales of balanced evaluation. Instead, her arms are crossed defensively in front of her heart, cutting off her feelings, allowing nothing to come in or go out. It could be a perfect portrait of analysis paralysis.
And while the woman’s position is stable for now, the swords she holds are enormous, and certainly she won’t be able to maintain that position for very long.
This is a card that often comes up when we feel we must block our emotions. It may also appear when we feel stuck and indecisive. We may vacillate between choice A and choice B, when what we really want is “None of the above.”
As you may know, when the Moon is full, it is in the opposite zodiac sign of where the Sun is. So with the Sun currently in Aquarius, the Feb. 7 Full Moon is in Leo. Astrologer Lynn Hayes explains that this polarity will be “necessitating a balance between our identification with the personal (Leo) and our lives as part of a collective (Aquarius).”
In what ways this week might you be facing a choice between, as Lynn describes it, the personal and the transpersonal? Is there a conflict between what you as an individual envision, as opposed to what the group wants? Are the two choices truly at odds? How can you make such a decision?
The Two of Swords can be helpful when we feel stuck, because it reminds us how impossible it can be to make up our mind about things that may have little to do with the mind at all. Swirling all around the woman is the great, dark sea of emotional, subconscious awareness, the deep of dreams and intuition. Yet she refuses to, or cannot, access it.
Our intelligent, logical brain is a great gift, but it is only one tool for navigating our life’s journey, and sometimes it is the wrong one.
Still, we make our lists of pros and cons. We rationalize, argue, and refuse to listen to our hearts, thinking that somehow this will be smart. But sometimes we can be too smart for our own good. Meantime, as much as we might want to close our eyes and fade into the gray background, something eventually will need to happen. We avoid the truth at our peril.
This week, if you find yourself “between a rock and a hard place,” feeling like you need to make a difficult choice you wish you didn’t have to, this card offers some illumination. First, have compassion for the role fear may be playing, disguising itself as an insatiable need for information and options.
Consider the ways you may be closing your eyes or your heart from knowledge that is not logical or analytical. There is a very good chance that non-logical information is precisely what you need, in order to proceed with wisdom.
Could it also be that this is but a bit of drama, a scene being played out more for effect than an authentic situation? What is really going on “backstage?”
Choose something. Or perhaps let go of choosing at all. What would happen if you just let it be?
Fearful indecision is a slow poison. Drop your weapons. Open your eyes. Most important, open your heart. See what happens.