We will only understand the miracle of life fully when we allow the unexpected to happen.
— Paulo Coelho
As we explore the deeply rooted habits of blocking our inner artist, it might help to know that many times, these temptations show up disguised as coincidence.
I see this all the time in my Tarot practice. The unhappy husband who has been in a dead marriage for years “just happens” to hear from an old flame on Facebook, one thing leads to another, and now there is a crisis. Just when someone is preparing to go on a weeklong writer’s retreat, their partner “suddenly” is fed up and quits their job, making sure that retreat cannot happen. Just as she is finding her wings, the toxic boyfriend pops up again “out of nowhere” and down she crashes.
She just happens to call…He drops by with a killer bag of weed…I was just about to get started but … Name your poison.
Another chapter of distractions; another bitter disappointment and delay to our artist child.
Julia writes, “The choice to block is a creative U-turn. We turn back on ourselves. Like water forced to a standstill, we turn stagnant. The self-honesty lurking in us all always knows when we choose against our greater good. It marks a little jot on our spiritual blackboard: ‘Did it again.’ It takes grace and courage to admit and surrender our blocking devices.”
So why should we surrender our blocks, especially if they are working for us? Well, at some point, probably quite some time ago, they actually stopped working for you and for me. We just keep hoping and pretending that they still are, like whistling in the dark.
How do I know they aren’t working for you anymore? Because you are here, aren’t you? You show up, maybe faithfully day after day, or maybe peeking in from time to time. But the truth is, we are all on this journey together because our inner creator is shaking us awake and telling us that it is their turn now.
Why would we continue to block that? What is the payoff for this self-abuse?
“Blocked we know who and what we are: unhappy people,” Julia explains. “Unblocked, we may be something much more threatening – happy. For most of us, happy is terrifying, unfamiliar, out of control, too risky!”
The bottom line is, our choice of whether we will succumb to our blocking behavior again, or not, is essentially a test of our faith. Rather than trust our intuition, our talent, our skill and our desire as strong, loving allies, we fear where our creator/Creator is taking us. Rather than the risky act of putting our hopeful, tender, authentic naked inner self on the line by painting, writing, or auditioning, we opt out by turning to our blocks.
We all have our little ways of shoring up the comfort zone that keeps us safely sad. Maybe it’s because the prospect of having dashed hopes again is just too frightening. But here’s the real deal. The thing that may be scariest of all is not dashed hopes, but hopes fulfilled. The prospect of becoming truly unleashed, powerful creators could be overwhelming. Yet here we are, you and I coming together, day after day, longing for exactly that.
And therein lies my faith. How about you?